In my creative work with Lush Life and BAACAL, I wanted to challenge the idea of fashion as frivolity.
It’s been a constant message I’ve received my entire career- often in many rooms, I struggled to be taken seriously because of my love for it. And yet, at 400 pounds, I knew all too intimately how my body was perceived by people.
How one small misstep, say a squirt of mustard on my blouse, could instantly provoke confirmation bias that fat people are sloppy, lazy, unclean- and all the nonverbal messages I would often receive.
Of course, the decision- whether I like it or not- to have now lost 200 pounds has reopened wounds from my past.
The Remy Dress, BAACAL | Shop Here | *Affiliate Links: I want to be transparent about how I earn a living. My curated edits feature affiliate links, which allow me to retain a commission for creating and promoting my content, and items I love, sort of like a referral fee. Should you decide to purchase, the brand is responsible with sending me a small commission for plug and promotion. This of course, is at no additional cost to the consumer.
At my previous size, I was labeled the “ice queen”- this villain flitting about in silk dresses with a maniacal laugh- partly because the American fantasy of fat people is that we be lighthearted and jovial. That we be passive. But as a Black Trans Woman has boundaries, is self assured and of an evolved mind, is assertive, and can read and write in 3 languages- and you’re fat? Good gracious, you must be an evil queen (Now I’m probably really an ice queen! HA!!)
These double standards would reveal itself in my interpersonal relationships- and my intimate relationships- where the men in my life felt that I should feel lucky to be with them, considering my size. (You must not know ARIA SA’ID darling! HA! ). And they would show up in my work- in rooms where people often I thought I was the assistant- not the CEO. Or in community, “Why Her?” was always a thing- especially because of my size. The threads on facebook citing that I looked like Planet of the Apes comes to mind, even today.
While I didn’t grow up being plus sized, I learned in my mid 20’s just how slippery slope politics and double standards play when you visually don’t “conform” to the spectrum of desirability that is pushed onto us.
While so many in the body positivity space have sent messages and DM’s (you’re not one of us anymore! stop taking up space) and so on- my message has always- both then, and now, since day 1- to promote the sanctity of our bodies as we are, in the present. And more broadly- that no one- not one institution or person- can have a property right to our bodies. Body Autonomy is the highest freedom we can have. And we have the human right to decide how to exist.
And we deserve to exist, in all of our various forms.
Even so, I have maintained a desire to still inspire plus size women in my life, to enjoy getting dressed.
In a world with too many negative messages, too emboldened, with too much gaslighting that says how we should exist- and apparently, how fat folks are existing in the wrong way- I have long desired to see a shift.
I actually loved my body, deeply- and sometimes prefer it as opposed to who I am now. And I loved getting dressed.
And I wanted women to love getting dressed just as much as I did.
Cynthia Vincent of BAACAL + Aria Sa’id <3
With the label of frivolity ruminating in my brain, ever so often as former colleagues or associates making jabs at my more recent work as “vain”, “shallow” (i suppose I am all those things too!)- I wanted to explore this idea of power dressing, for the gladiator.
Social Change Leaders are arguably or closest representation to the concept of warriors. More and more people are turning and plugging into advocates and activists who are working to solve the world’s complex social issues- as doom scrolling and the feeling of being “immobilized” by news headlines and constant updates from corners around the world continue to grow.
These gladiators have to be both charming, and approachable. Of the people, but able to code switch to appease and appeal to the wealthy (donors). Too ostentatious and you lose public trust- but too meager and people question your legitimacy.
Let’s be real- no one likes to be panhandled- otherwise our homeless siblings would finally have stable housing from panhandling.
The reality people often forget is that 70% of communication is nonverbal. And humans are very visual creatures. And even your most forward thinking, progressive folks? They’re judgmental AF.
Nevertheless, my question is: What do the Gladiators Wear?
In today’s post, they are wearing BAACAL, who has lovingly sponsored this post with my friends at MASTO FOUNDATION and Forward Global- who understood my vision of storytelling and amplifying the voices of women in unique ways.
*Sponsored Content: Today’s musing is lovingly sponsored by BAACAL, a beautiful brand helmed by noted fashion designer, Cynthia Vincent.
BAACAL is an ethically focused and sustainability contemporary designer providing you with luxury apparel in mid size and plus sizes. Independent, woman of color led and operated, and all pieces are hand stitched, sewn and cut in their studio in Los Angeles.
Aria is also a Style Advisor with the brand, so you’ll see stylings and musings from me ever so often for sartorial options for my mid-size and plus size subscribers seeking lovely forever pieces for their closet.
Thanks for reading Lush Life By Aria Sa'id! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.
Jessica Nowlan is Reimagining Freedom For All Women
Jessica Nowlan, CEO of Reimagine Freedom
I was incredibly fortunate to visit Jessica Nowlan ‘s home to chat Reimagine Freedom and the power of collective organizing, with formerly and currently incarcerated women and girls at the center of her work towards decarceration and Reimagine Freedom’s mandate to expand our framework of what freedom is, for our system impacted communities.
Video: Jessica defines her sense of purpose, with Reimagine Freedom and their freedom charter.
Jessica is styled in BAACAL’s Remy Dress | Shop Here
Reimagine Freedom.
Styled in BAACAL - i wanted to explore visually what it means to dress a gladiator. what does gladiators wear in their day to day lives as they work to solve and contend with complex systems and social issues impacting our folks?
Thank you Jessica for being such an endearing light for women across the country.
a fun candid! Jessica came to my pop up event with BAACAL last year, and purchased the 1st edition of the ARIA Trench. TY DARLING!
I’m honored you let me come to your home and always amazed at the vision of freedom you have for all of us.
All the ways you show up for our folks.
I’m a huge fan and THANK YOU!!!
Marnina is Advocating for Thousands of Women Living With HIV Across North America
Marnina shared her journey of self discovery: the joy and resilience it takes to love the skin we’re in- beneath the clothes. Highlighting her journey of accepting her HIV diagnosis in her late teens, early 20’s - and embracing her queerness gave her the confidence to use her voice to advocate for women who are often overlooked, even in HIV/AIDS Advocacy and Awareness.
I had the chance to style Marnina and film her in my home here in Houston, and it meant a lot to me that she would be willing to share her journey.
Both Jessica and Marnina shared their journeys navigating great triumph in their public service work- and the common thread was how often it’s fueled by our own trauma, which then becomes a call to action to ourselves to stand up and fight.
This month, I hope you feel inspired by these women’s stories as much as I do.
Marnina on celebrating her body: When I began to decolonize my mind, is when I started to celebrate my body.
